CAN I GET a MAN WITH THAT?

STRING-A-LONG STRIPTEASE

A lap dance turns out to be a blushing surprise for today’s contributor and her beau

I had just started dating this cute guy I met at the gym. I take a striptease aerobics class there and on one of our get-togethers I decided to try out some moves on him that I learned in class.

I had my period, but thought I could just put the tampon in so that the string wouldn’t show.  I would only give him a lap dance. In my imagination I saw it making me looked outlandishly sexy and hard to get at the same time, when in reality I was being cock-blocked by Aunt Flow.

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WE ARE FAMILY

Today’s contributor and her sister find themselves together in the sex trenches

When I was still in high school, I visited my older sister at
college for the weekend. I had gone up to see her a few times by myself, but this time, I decided to bring my boyfriend with me.

My sister is not the overprotective, loving family member that is stereotyped
to fit the role of an older sister, mine is the type that wants to get me as
hammered as possible so that I don’t remember getting home. With this
information into account, she bought three bottles of liquor and two cases of
beer to start off with before taking my boyfriend and me out to a party.

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VENI, VIDI, VICI

She came, he saw, she conquered. All while sitting on his face.

So my boyfriend and I had just started to mess around back in high school and I was so new to everything that whatever he did made me feel amazing.  It was almost embarrassing how turned on I got when we were going at it. 

One day, past innocence and before losing my virginity, my boyfriend was tired of eating me out the vanilla way and wanted me to sit on his face.  I was so excited to try it!  As he lay down on his back on the bed, I worked my way up so that I was sitting on his face.

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GET (OFF) THE BUS

Today’s contributor has trouble getting off (but not getting kicked off) on a public bus

Me and my boyfriend had been together for over two years but we had a sexual passion that was unparalleled. We had had sex thousands of times but we still did it at least twice a day. The best thing was that we knew exactly how to get each other off, and we could make it last two hours or two minutes.

One night, we’d gone out to the bars in my town drinking and had really gotten wasted. We couldn’t drive home and were too drunk to walk so we decided to take public transportation. We got on the bus and sat in the back and started to fool around. We must have been way too drunk to be hooking up because we both fell asleep while we were messing around. I’m not sure how long we were asleep, but it must have been a long time because we were woken up by the bus driver.

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FIVE ALARM FLING

A no-strings-attached romp gets really, really hot for today’s contributor

My best guy friend and I have a “friendship with benefits” relationship and our intimacy is really spontaneous.  It’s the perfect situation for us — we have really hot sex without all the messy relationship stuff tripping us up.   

One day as hanging out turned into hooking up, I suggested we spice things up a bit. I had brought along a scarf and some new lube that I wanted to try out. Things really started to heat up as he tied me loosely to the bed and asked where the lube was. It was really doing wonders that night — I was feeling every sensation and loving it.

Pretty soon, though, the sensation turned really warm.   Then it went from really warm to burning. I begged him to untie the scarf and as soon as he did, i got up abruptly and something started screaming “My vagina is on fire!” I dashed out of his dorm room and into the men’s communal shower butt naked and turned on the shower to cool myself. I’m pretty sure there were onlookers in the hall, but I was too worried about my burning privates to notice. 

Needless to say, my friend and I keep it pretty vanilla in the bedroom these days — or at the very least —room temperature.

FREE RIDE

Today’s contributor channels a really bad Charlie Sheen movie

My boyfriend and I were on our way to New York City — an excruciatingly long ride from the suburbs during 6am traffic. He was driving my car to his construction work sight and at this ungodly hour, we hadn’t been able to get our dose of morning sex. We were extremely horny, not to mention, bored since we were forced to drive around 10mph.

So, while on FDR Drive, a six lane highway in New York, I decided to trade my passenger seat for the driver’s seat — with him still in it. This was in broad daylight, so the cars next to us got a little show. One guy was talking on his phone and we heard him scream, “Oh shit, the people in the car next to me are getting it in.” We began laughing hysterically. We were almost finished as my boyfriend got to our exit. I got off of him and we kissed passionately at the next stop light. I thought this to be one of our greatest sexual accomplishments yet.

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STICK SHIFT

Today’s contributor learns the true value of a head’s up

My boyfriend and I had been dating for two years and needed to spice up our enjoyable, but increasingly vanilla, sex life. Without wanting to get too kinky or weird, we decided to have sex in public. And sex in public we had— restrooms, coat checks, cabs — you name it.

The rush was amazing and I found myself wanting to hook up with him more than I had in the beginning of our relationship. After months of not getting caught,  I guess I thought we were invincible. Maybe that’s why I decided to give him road head for the first time in a rental car on our way to the beach.

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CANDID CAMERA

Today’s contributor gets caught in a flash

I have been in a long distance relationship for two years—distance may make the heart grow fonder, but it also makes the vagina horny! Between school and work, I had not seen my boyfriend in four months— my hormones were raging.

I love my boyfriend to know that I’ve been waiting for him, meaning I don’t touch myself while we are apart. But four months was pushing me to my limits. It was definitely time for a change. After a long school day, I went straight to my room and called my boyfriend. I knew this conversation would be different.

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PEEPING TOMS

Today’s reader discovers that her friends are more curious than she thought.

It was the biggest sports weekend of the whole year for our college because we were playing our football rival. My three best friends and my sister went with me on our three day weekend road trip. We met some guys at our hotel and ended up drinking with them after the game. Me and one of the guys got really drunk and started making out at the bar. We all split a cab home and the next thing, clothes were flying and we were starting to have sex in the back seat. 

Realizing that we were in front of our friends, we somehow mustered up the tact to decide to hold off until we got back to the hotel room to really go at it. When we got back we immediately jumped on top of each other without surveying the state of the room. The sex was unbelievably intense, I was on top of him, riding hard and screaming loud - our team may have been the Bears but in that moment I was a Cowgirl. I opened my eyes to catch my breath and pull back my hair when I saw something moving in my peripheral vision. 

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ARE YOU THERE, VODKA?

A fantasy ride goes awry for today’s intoxicated coed

During college I spent most of my social life engaging in drinking games with my crush and his friends. On our winter break, we chilled at a friend’s apartment, ordered pizza and decided to wash it down with cheap vodka. This was quickly becoming an everyday routine, except one particular day things went a little further.

Since we were getting trashed every day, I became overly confident in my ability to hold liquor. I would say things like “I love how vodka runs through my veins,” as I upgraded from shot glasses to tea cups! I was taking shot after shot, straight with no chaser. One teacup turned into two and two turned into four and before I knew it, I was dancing on the kitchen counter like I was a professional Coyote Ugly girl. 

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