CAN I GET a MAN WITH THAT?

PUBELIC HUMILIATION

Today’s contributor gets caught in a hairy situation

My first week of college I had already met a really cute guy—he was my roommate’s twin brother. We would hang out often and get to know each other. Before I knew it we were hanging out almost every day. We were on the verge of a relationship.

One day, as I was showering the fire alarm went off. It was the first drill I had ever experienced, I panicked! I didn’t know if it was real or some drunk kid pulling the alarm, so I took my towel, wrapped it around myself however I could and ran out of the dorm! I saw the guy I was talking to and went up to him thinking I would look cute all wet and wrapped in my pink towel. Not exactly the case.

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JUST BEAT IT

Today’s contributor meets a real jerk off

It used to be that if I met a guy at a party and we hit it off, I would bring him back to my dorm room to hook up. That was until the weekend I brought home a visitor from another college, who had some strange habits.

It started when our make out session was interrupted by my roommate demanding I let her inside. So, I abruptly kicked him out. But later that night, I received a series of text messages: “I really like u girl. Do u think u could like me too?” It struck me as odd, but I let it slide because I figured he was really drunk. And boy, was I right.

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PEEPING TOMS

Today’s reader discovers that her friends are more curious than she thought.

It was the biggest sports weekend of the whole year for our college because we were playing our football rival. My three best friends and my sister went with me on our three day weekend road trip. We met some guys at our hotel and ended up drinking with them after the game. Me and one of the guys got really drunk and started making out at the bar. We all split a cab home and the next thing, clothes were flying and we were starting to have sex in the back seat. 

Realizing that we were in front of our friends, we somehow mustered up the tact to decide to hold off until we got back to the hotel room to really go at it. When we got back we immediately jumped on top of each other without surveying the state of the room. The sex was unbelievably intense, I was on top of him, riding hard and screaming loud - our team may have been the Bears but in that moment I was a Cowgirl. I opened my eyes to catch my breath and pull back my hair when I saw something moving in my peripheral vision. 

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TEACHER’S PET

Today’s contributor skips to the ‘head’ of the class

It was the beginning of a new semester with new classes and new teachers. One of my professors was especially sexy, and I ended up staying after class to talk to him. This pattern continued every day for weeks. One day I said something about how much I like to drink wine and he invited me over to his apartment to sample from his wine collection. 

I knew this was a bad idea, but it had a certain forbidden appeal. I went over to his place where we drank wine and talked for hours until I was drunk. The next thing I knew, he threw me on the ground and started going down on me. I thought about stopping him, but he was just so damn good at it. 

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ARE YOU THERE, VODKA?

A fantasy ride goes awry for today’s intoxicated coed

During college I spent most of my social life engaging in drinking games with my crush and his friends. On our winter break, we chilled at a friend’s apartment, ordered pizza and decided to wash it down with cheap vodka. This was quickly becoming an everyday routine, except one particular day things went a little further.

Since we were getting trashed every day, I became overly confident in my ability to hold liquor. I would say things like “I love how vodka runs through my veins,” as I upgraded from shot glasses to tea cups! I was taking shot after shot, straight with no chaser. One teacup turned into two and two turned into four and before I knew it, I was dancing on the kitchen counter like I was a professional Coyote Ugly girl. 

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DORM DAZE

A college coed wakes up in the wrong bed

I woke up groggy after a long night out. The clock read 7:27am and I was in unfamiliar territory. I had just moved into a new room, so it took me a minute to realize where I was. I was fully clothed in my own pajamas—a flannel matching set with cupcakes—but I wasn’t in my bed and I wasn’t alone.

 I slowly turned over to see who was laying next to me. It was an older guy—score! But he looked vaguely familiar. I was so confused that I aggressively shook him awake. A look of disbelief, embarrassment and sheer terror came across his face all at once. I immediately blurted out the first three questions that came to mind: “How did I get here? Who are you? Oh my god, did we hook up??!!!”

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SEX SPRAIN

Today’s contributor learns that a good workout may cause injury

I was off to visit my boyfriend for the first time since summer break. At the top of my list? End our maddening dry spell! Then his parents rained on our parade—we were sleeping in separate bedrooms and absolutely no sex! I was as wet as I was going to get.

By the second night, we couldn’t take it anymore. While watching TV in the basement, we attacked each other like jack rabbits—he pulled my hair, I yanked his clothes. Soon after, my panties flew off and things got intense. We figured what his parents didn’t know wouldn’t hurt them. Unfortunately, it would hurt me.

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DATING 101

A college freshman learns why some rules aren’t meant to be broken

A month into my freshman year of college I started dating my RA. We had to keep it a secret, since our taboo romance was technically against the rules. One weekend, he told me his friend was coming to visit, who just happened to be an ex-girlfriend. I was fine with it, but when he left to run an errand, I seized the opportunity to check her out. 

We started talking, and she nonchalantly informed me that he was her boyfriend of over four years! I immediately confronted him, and he gave me a sob story of how she had cheated on him numerous times. They were on and off, but he planned on breaking up with her for good that weekend. Being the naive freshman that I was, I gave him a second chance.

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PISS AND TELL

A weak bladder interferes with a romantic encounter

Senior year of college, I worked for the university’s in-house catering company, which meant lots of long hours standing on my feet. By the end of a 10-hour shift, I was exhausted and just wanted to go home. In fact, so exhausted that I ignored the tingling sensation that signaled I had to pee.

En route to the bus stop, I realized my bladder wasn’t going to make it the 8 minutes it would take to reach my off-campus apartment, or the 2 minutes it would take to sprint back to my job. I ran to the nearest building in a panic, but it was Sunday—the doors were locked—so I made a mad dash for the bushes a few yards away. Unfortunately, I came up short. By that I mean, literally 10 steps to the huge flower pot in front of the building, where I plopped down and released—just as soon as my crush pulled up offering me a ride!

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ROOM RAIDERS

Too much action sends one college coed packing

My roommate and I share a split double dorm, meaning there’s a wall that conveniently divides it in half. But when the door opens, however, you can see straight onto my side of the room. My roommate’s side is behind the wall.

We had talked earlier on about bringing guys back to the room to have sex. In fact, we were both pretty open about it. We agreed that since there’s a wall dividing us, if one person wants to have sex while the other is in the room, it’s perfectly fine, since you cant see anything anyways. But my roommate quickly changed her mind when she realized I was the only one getting any action, and she had no one. I was having sex almost every time she was in the room.

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