CRUNCH TIME
An ill-timed junk food craving lends new meaning to the term ”eating out”
After an extended single period and a resulting dry spell, I had finally let one of my friends set me up with a guy and we’d hit it off online, but had never met in person. After weeks of chatting, he agreed to come visit me at my college. I was excited that my dry spell was finally going to end.
We began by going to a frat party, but after a little over an hour, we were all over each other and decided to head back to my room. That’s when things really started to heat up. He began kissing everywhere and making a smooth transition down to my lonely nether-regions. I couldn’t have been happier when he started working his tongue down there.Everything was going great…until he suddenly stopped. I had my eyes closed and couldn’t see what was going on. One minute I heard soft slurping and the next thing I know I’m hearing…crunching. I opened my eyes with a startled look on my face only to find my new man digging deep into a bag of Doritos that he had started and left near my bed earlier that night. I looked at him, implying that I wanted an answer and he just stared me back down and said, “What? I’m taking a break?” He then quickly went back down to doing the deed.
If he hadn’t been so good at what he was doing I would have pushed him off and ran to the shower. I mean, this guy was knowingly putting Doritos all over my you-know-what. He made me feel like a damn vending machine! Luckily the rest of the night turned out good, my dry spell was broken. The best part? My cravings for junk food have miraculously disappeared.
