THE PARENT TRAP
Today’s contributor and her boyfriend aren’t as clever as they think they are
My boyfriend and I started sneaking out of our houses in high school to see (read: bone) each other and we started to feel like we could get away with anything. Typically, we would wait until my parents were asleep, but one night I was so horny, I convinced him to sneak in through my side window — my room is just one story above ground. Out of the excitement of having pulled that off, we were hot and bothered and couldn’t help making more noise than we usually did. I covered my mouth with my hand was constantly shushing my guy.
Minutes later, I heard my mom call my name. I thought, “It’s nothing, she’s just checking up on me.” I told her I was sleeping. Naïvely thinking she was going to drop it, I heard “Is there someone in there with you?” I started to panic, but mustered enough courage to say no firmly. The next thing I knew, my mom was screaming, “Open up your door and let me check right NOW!!!”
As I tried to think of something to keep her from checking my room, she raised her voice louder. I realized it was too late for anything and told my boyfriend to get out ASAP. I told him to just jump out of the window (a full story above ground) and to go hide out somewhere until the coast was clear. Then he noticed that something was missing. He whispered, “I forgot my clothes! At least throw me my pants!” I quickly threw him his pants and congratulated myself on my resourcefulness.
Little did I know that my parents were one step ahead of me. My dad was outside waiting and searching for him in the bushes. And he caught him alright — red-handed and butt naked. His parents were called. We each got long lectures about respect. We swore we’d never sneak around again and that lasted a couple months. Eventually we resumed our game of hide and sneak out, but we’ve been more careful and haven’t been busted yet. It’s only against the rules when you get caught, right?
